Archive for the ‘ Sad ’ Category

To S & T

Last night, Selph messaged me and told me that T popped the question to her and they were gonna get engaged. Two of my best friends finally tying the knot after 10 years since I’ve known them. We all knew that this was bound to happen, but they’ve been together for so long, that none of us were really expecting it.

When she told me, I was so happy. This was one of the most amazing news I’ve heard in a while. Yet as it slowly sunk in, it kinda made me sad. How many of my close friends have I missed. So many of them have gotten married or are about to get engaged, and I’ve missed every single one. Yes, I’ve attended some of them, but only if the reception was somewhere in the local area. It pains me personally not actually being there and supporting them in such momentous parts of their life.

I’ve been to a few weddings over these few years. But none of which really meant all that much to me. There were a few that were relatives, one of them being a cousin of mine. There were work colleagues wedding, and there were also friends of friend’s that I had attended. So many of these events which would have actually meant something to me, I have actually missed. Talk about priorities right? I’m such a failure in that respect. The only one that I made and did something about was the one for Mike and Janet, and even then that was cause they hosted an additional reception here where I was. I know that things have been difficult for me and being far away from everybody else, especially over the past half a decade, but I know I could’ve done more. Sometimes, even though your heart could be in the right place, it really doesn’t matter if you made no effort to begin with.

I know it’s a personal decision to choose not to use FB, because society has now grown around it and has somewhat become dependent of it, I’ve basically excluded myself from all my friends who do use it. Dunno, it just sux how things have come to be…